I took my first one last night after a week of being the dirtiest I’ve ever been. I swear I could build a sand castle with the amount of sand and dirt in my bed. To my utter surprise I enjoyed the bucket shower so much that I think I might adopt the same method when I return home – so less wasteful as well. I love the simplicity that goes hand in hand with living life here. It’s wonderful. We took 8 of the older children to the beach yesterday – such a ball playing in the surf. To add to my need for a shower Isaac and Landi thought it hilarious to start a sand war and after, they drug me into the ocean; I was nowhere near capable of matching their strength. 10 year old boys who already work as hard as grown men do in America (during the Great Depression that is – times have definitely changed). One of the other volunteers, Kristin, taught with me at the school yesterday. The school is constructed from massive bamboo stalks – Ghanians are ridiculously crafty and make use of anything and everything – nothing is ever wasted. I tackled the English lesson which brought back rather horrendous memories of prepositional sentences. Every boy in Africa carries a machete, regardless of age. On top of that, some of the nursery rhymes we sing are about guns. What a culture.
On a more personal note, anyone who has spent a length of time around me will agree that I typically don’t have any difficulties expressing my emotions. Lately, I find myself burying them and unable to open to the difficult emotions I’m aware of an to illuminate those that are hidden. It’s one thing to watch National Geographic or read about orphanage life in a book, but to actually be immersed in it is an entirely different story; being here has made me the happiest girl imaginable, but it has also produced a deep sadness in my core. However, I’m finding that with mindfulness and through practicing diligent awareness, our hearts become spacious enough to hold painful emotions, to feel them, and to let them go. Paying attention is one of the single most important things we can do to benefits all beings as one of my beloved Taoist mentors has said. And the more mindful and aware we become of our own physical or emotional difficulties, the more strength, courage, and insight we have in being with the suffering of others – in my case currently, these beautiful children. Thich Nhat Hanh once said, “Compassion is a verb.” To me this insinuates that true compassion means actively engaging with the suffering in the world and responding to the various needs of beings in whatever ways are possible and appropriate. Compassion may take the form of small, unrequited or unnoticed acts of simply being a little kinder, more generous, or more forgiving and accepting of those around us. At times it may require acts of tremendous courage and determination in the face of adversity and hardship. It’s not as though there’s a particular prescription for what to do. The field of compassionate response is limitless and creative. The important thing is to water and nurture the seed of the awakened heart of compassion (Bodhichitta, as Buddhists say) within us and cultivate the intention to benefit all. To deliver compassion and love, we must first love ourselves and to receive compassion and love one must be willing to open to one’s vulnerability — this does not mean to be weakened, infact, it results in becoming stronger than we ever imagined possible.